Alphabet 2.0 (aka, wrong as hell)

Today I’ll be critiquing some random throwaway alphabet book.  It’s pretty generic, but it also enjoys the distinction of having 100% market saturation – meaning every parent in America owns this book in some form.  I think they have a small dumpster filled with them at the hospital, and when you get discharched you simply reach in and grab one.  It’s right next to the dumpster that you throw a few thousand dollars into.

The setup: They do the alphabet with photos.  There’s a subplot about a prostitute from New Orleans, but it seems forced and out of place, so we mostly skip it.

The plot: See above.  It’s images and words; plots are far too high-fallootin for this genre.

What works: the “M”onkey picture is kinda amusing.  Abby was always in love this book, so we have a guaranteed “win” with her if we ever mention it.

What fails miserably: See photo below.

I don’t know what they trying to pull, laying out the book this way.  But I’ll just make my point by asking you a question:

Guess what letter my kids think “dog” stands with??

Thanks, books.  Thanks for whatever the reverse of teaching is.